This morning I had a lovely conversation with her on the phone. It was light hearted, upbeat, we laughed, we said niceties at the end - lovely. Then we had a normal text conversation - just general crap, meaning nothing, but I thought it meant she wanted to text me - perhaps she was just humouring me, I don't know. It certainly didn't go as well as I thought it did. It went a little something like this:
Me - Do you fancy going out on Friday for a drink and to play pool? Nothing in it, just be nice to see you in a relaxed atmosphere.
Her - I would, but I've already promised (girls name) that I'd go out with her, sorry.
Me - That's ok, no problem.
Her - *sends picture of kitten and cat she's living with* This is the kitten and the cat.
Me - Aww the kitten is cute
Her - Yeah she is, still doesn't like me though
Me - That's because you're loud lol
Her - I'm not loud *pokey tongue face*
Me - No you're not loud at all are you? Like a mouse you *big grin face*
See what I mean - totally normal, there was no need to send me the picture of the cat, or to have the pointless conversation after it - but she did.
Then I go to work, had a chat with the driver, played with the kid a little (more on my job later), and I get a text, from her sister, it says "Kim's just text me saying she's not coming to mine for Christmas now" I was dumbfounded, when I'd spoken to her this morning I'd offered her a lift to her sisters on Christmas Eve and she'd accepted, said the bloke she's staying with was going away for 3 days. Instantly - as you do - my head starts whirring. Perhaps she's going to come home on Christmas, it is our anniversary after all, perhaps after this morning she's warmed to me a little, perhaps because I told her I wasn't celebrating Christmas she's going to surprise me to tell me we can give it another go. No. Don't be so f-ing stupid Nikki. Why on earth would you think that? My driver told me not to get my hopes up, my mum told me not to get my hopes up, I'm not I say, it's just the only plausible thing I can think of her doing, surely she's not going to spend it with someone she's only known for 2 months? Surely she's not going to wake up on a practical strangers sofa on Christmas morning and proceed to spend the day with him?
Well she is. She texted me to tell me so. She's not in the mood for happy Christmas people. And I feel like a total idiot; and that I've been run over by a ten tonne truck.
Another day, another hurdle - this is becoming my daily motto.
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